@MaxC_MPWL Yup!! I found it
[The rest of the drive back to New Orleans was filled with music and greasy diners. But try as I might, with each mile that passed I felt the pit in my stomach at moving back home deepened until I felt truly nauseous. I’d almost forgotten how bad traffic could be in the Big Easy, and finally made it to my parents’ house after the sun had set. Their house located in Uptown New Orleans had more bedrooms than they needed now that most of their children had moved out… all of their children except me. Well Jesse’s room was still there if he wanted it, but he currently lived which his best friend Scottie. So I would be the only child out of six that was back living at home. The porch lights were lit as my parents’ cars sit parked in the narrow driveway. That would be a struggle with logistics. Though later I could easily park mine inside the backyard and mainly rely on public transportation like I did when I was growing up. My head shakes slightly as if not to get stuck into a younger mindset. This was not a permanent move back home. It was just until I could get back on my feet… I hoped. My mother’s face could be seen looking out from the foyer where the glass door and accompanied windows gave a full view to the entry of their house. Her eyes darting down to my car before calling out behind her. No doubt to my father. A shudder ran through me, though I couldn’t place the emotion behind it. Maybe fear? Or humiliation? All I knew was that I was going to have to eventually go in there and confront them, confront the messy state my life had gotten to. With a heavy sigh, I shut off my car and push the door open. Only grabbing the essentials that I needed like my satchel containing my phone and wallet. By this point my mother had made it out onto the raised porch. Her arms wrapped around her body as she watched me make my way to the stairs and approach her. “Oh baby.” Yep, that was my mom. Never one to be subtle about how tragic it was for me to be here. You’d think someone had just run over my dog. Not that I ever had one. Her arms release her body, opening up for me to walk into.] Hey mama. [I wrap my own around her and another shudder goes through me. Tears trying to creep their way into my eyes unbidden as the emotion was thick between us. God help me when my father was added into the mix. “It’s good to have you home, Emma. Your father is making steaks in the backyard for us.” I didn’t know how to feel about that. My return home didn’t seem like a steak dinner occasion. But who was I to argue with Mama Mosby. She continues speaking while pulling back to grab the duffel bag I’d brought with me. It was full of clothes I’d wanted easy access to. The rest remained in luggage bags in the trunk of my car. “Why don’t you go say hi to him while I set your stuff up in one of the bedrooms. Maybe downstairs so you can have a bit more privacy?” Her eyebrow quirks up at me in amusement. I wasn’t sure I was grateful for the consideration or should be worried about my mother already planning things around my life. Yeah, I needed to get back on my feet ASAP. Nodding my head slightly, we head inside where I can set my satchel down by the front door. My mother heading down the stairs to the raised basement area of the house calling out to me one last thing that had me cringing. “Oh and your brothers should all be coming for dinner as well.” Closing my eyes, I take in a deep breath in an attempt to try and calm myself. The last time I’d seen all of my family at one time was years ago when I’d first moved to Baltimore. I had come home for Christmas and it had been nice actually. I mean I loved my family, there were no horrible skeletons in the closet when it came to them. But when I’d gotten back to my job I felt the acute loss of them once more. So I made my trips back home more infrequent and when I did come back there was usually something that kept at least one or two of my brothers away. The last time I’d been home was almost 2 years ago for Jesse’s first real gig out of college, which he only attended to further his knowledge of music. Truthfully he probably could have gotten into Julliard, but that would require leaving behind Scottie and those two have always been tied at the hip. So of course he went to college with him instead. Pushing aside the thoughts of my brothers, I head back through the living room and kitchen/dining room to get to the backyard. At some point, the grill must have been moved up to the deck, because before I even stepped out of the house I could already see my father standing there keeping watch over the steaks. As quietly as possibly, my hand pushed open the back door and my feet came to a stop next to him as if I’d never been gone and this was a regular occurrence.] So steaks, huh? Does this mean that I have the infamous Mosby mashed potatoes to look forward to at dinner? [The low chuckle from my father seems to reverberate through me. There was something comforting about it, about being back home. Despite the other half of me that was still freaking the fuck out. Probably because it was fighting this feeling, not used to the easy at peace feeling I could get from my family. “Well I figured it’d help since you’ll be suffering enough with all of your brothers coming to welcome you home.” His head turning to look at me with a soft, warm smile on his lips. “It’s good to have you back, kiddo.” The arm closest to me reaches out to pull my body into a side hug and I can’t help but reach my arms around his torso, burying my head into his chest as I did so many times growing up. And once again the tears threaten to reappear. Why had I been so stubborn about not coming home when in just a couple minutes both my parents had made me feel more safe and secure than I’d felt since the rug had been pulled out from under me. A thought niggled in the back of my head that I probably wouldn’t feel that way after a couple weeks… or days and that this was probably the honeymoon period. Pulling away before I actually shed some tears, my eyes glanced around the backyard and the surrounding houses.] Doesn’t seem like much has changed since I left. [“Well some things have changed, your mother can tell you what better than I could. But yeah, overall it’s just the same as when you left for Baltimore.” I give him a quick nod before taking a step back. The mention of where I’ve been only reminding me of why I was back home.] Um, I’m gonna go back in and see if Mom needs any help before the hooligans show up. You just make sure those steaks come out good. I miss those almost as much as I miss the potatoes. [With a soft chuckle between us, I head back inside and into the kitchen to find my mother at the island washing some vegetables. My eyes flickering up to the clock. Chances are it’d only be a little while before my brothers descended on us.] Do you need any help, Mama? [Her head looking up at me with a sweet smile. “No, sweetie. Why don’t you go downstairs and relax until your brothers get here. I’m sure it was a long drive for you.” Nodding in agreement with my mother, I wordlessly walk away from her and make my way downstairs to find my stuff set up in what used to be the twin’s bedroom growing up. Another deep sigh escapes me as I attempt to shut off my thoughts and emotions of being back. Falling onto the bed, my eyes close the second my head hits the pillow actually feeling just how exhausted I am from the long trip back home… and I still had a Mosby family dinner ahead of me. God help me.]
